Hi,
Today, I would like to write a symphony, but I am writing to you instead. I like to believe that you know why I am going through all this trouble just to say happy birthday. Something is off on my end.
Anyway...
Happy Birthday!
I had a wonderful time meeting you and I wish I could see you again soon. I will try to write you a letter when I am able to make it out that far again. For now, I just have these blog posts. I'll be honest: I haven't written a blog in a while, so I don't know how to make this sound beautiful and magical. I am also depressed. And manic. And psychotic. Sometimes it happens all at once. Other times very far apart. It happens because I have experienced traumas that I don't often have the bandwidth to face or explain.
Okay, for your birthday, I'll try to write something beautiful...
The world has billions of people on it, and I feel lucky that I met you. You are kind and easy-going, and I want to let you know that I wish the best for you and your endeavors. You are special to me because you helped me feel comfortable enough to step back and notice patterns in my life that make me feel uneasy. I've had to re-evaluate, and I admire anyone who is open enough about that kind of process to try and help another. I think it shows bravery, creativity, and compassion in a person. I don't know your life, but I hope you feel the luck, too, even if you have worked hard to be where you are. Maybe the better luck is to hope for gratitude.
You remind me of a tree. When I think tree, I think: tree house, hammocks, tight ropes, seeing the individual leaves when I first got a pair of glasses, the comfort I felt from trees after my friend saved me from drowning in the deep end of a pool. All I could see were the conifers...When I see a tree I don't want to chop it down to see the rings. I don't want to carve our initials. I just want a hug. I just want to protect it. Thank you for coming out to indulge me the best way you knew how. Sometimes, the best way I know how to help my friends is by being alone so I can protect them from me when life gets under my skin. I was so lonely when I met you. That's why I was joining bracket in the first place. What luck, everyone was so nice.
To me, none of this writing sounds beautiful. If you can, let me know what you think. I'm not going to write everything. You can read the room, right? Or just listen....our memories were music to my ears. But that's all they are now. Memories. "like the corners of my mind, misty water-colored memories..." ♭♯🎵
Take care.
Waterfall Girl
p.s. some random photos
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| mocktail and...hibiscus flower? |
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| My favorite outfit, bad pose |
